How I got into “this mess”(his words)

June 23, 2012...He is groggy this morning, looking like he could fall back to sleep at the table. He is feeding himself his banana, but needing help with the oatmeal. 

Between spoons of oatmeal he asked me" how did I get into this mess”, spreading his hands over the dining room table.  I was not sure what he meant, still not sure I do.  I asked him to explain.  He said about the house, and all the hassle, was it all worth it.  He did not say specifically his condition. He asked if I own the house. I told him yes.  So I am not sure he knows who I am or where he is.   He finished his oatmeal, and his eggs and bun and juice. He took to his woodworking magazines and seemed absorbed so I went to the computer.

He is still subdued, drowsy. Maybe he will sleep at the table for awhile.  He does that sometimes for a few minutes, sometimes for hours. I have been sitting in my office  for a while now and he has not called me. So he is probably sleeping. I will check on him in a few minutes.  

I have mixed feelings when he sleeps.  I get some “free” time but I cannot go anywhere. I cannot do anything that will disturb his sleep. I can’t get involved in something that requires a commitment of my time and attention because if he wakes and calls me I must drop what I am doing.    

It's time to check on him and maybe go see if there is any mail.  It's a beautiful day, not too hot or humid.  Maybe we'll go grocery shopping later.